What 8th Grade Football Taught Me About Commitment

A few years ago, I wrote this after watching my son play on the middle school football team. As a new school year begins, it reminds me of how much this experience taught both of us about commitment, and how its lessons apply to anyone navigating new activities and the challenges that come with them.

When your son plays on the football team for the first time in 8th grade, you brace yourself for a few bruises, both physical and emotional. Little did I know this would also be a huge learning curve for both of us. From the start, Andrew’s friends filled his head with horror stories. They told him how awful the practices would be and that he would hate every minute of it.

For the first few weeks, they weren’t wrong. The practices were intense, the fun factor was nonexistent, and he came home every day exhausted, sore, and wanting to quit. I’ll be honest—part of me wanted to let him quit. Between the $850 in fees and the time commitment, quitting didn’t sound like the worst idea. But I knew this was bigger than football. It was about a commitment to himself and to his team. It was about seeing something through, even when exhausted and unhappy.

His position was nose guard. A few of his friends dismissed it as a “nothing” role. I tried to reassure him that being on the field was the most important thing. Later, I asked our neighbor Jared, the star quarterback of the high school team, about the position. He quickly let me know that every position mattered, and he was more than willing to share that wisdom with Andrew and the rest of his team.

During games, I began to hear my son’s name repeated over the loudspeaker: “Number 47, TURK on the tackle.” The crowd started to notice, too. And then, during a play that made my heart stop and explode at the same time, Andrew came out of nowhere and sacked the other team’s quarterback. The stands went wild! 

When he earned the coveted tie-dyed shirt that signified “VIP Player of the Week,” all Andrew’s early doubts vanished. Every moment he had wanted to quit was replaced with pride, and every moment I had pushed him to stay committed felt worth it. His self-confidence skyrocketed in those few weeks. He didn’t just grow as a player—he grew as a person. That year laid the foundation for showing up and sticking it out, even when it would have been easier to quit.

As a new school year begins, I’m convinced that being part of something bigger than ourselves matters—whether it’s organized student activities or volunteering in the community. These experiences teach patience, responsibility, resilience, and that every role, regardless of others’ perceptions, has value and purpose. 

As parents, educators, and mentors, our role isn’t just to applaud the wins; it’s also to support the process. It’s to champion the commitment to showing up—not only when it’s fun, but especially when it’s not. It’s to help students see past the voices that say “I can’t” or “no one cares.” 

Every role a student takes on outside the classroom helps shape how they see themselves and how they engage with the world. It teaches patience, responsibility, leadership, and empathy. Our teens need these opportunities not just to build college résumés—but to build resilience, confidence, and character. As the adults cheer from the sidelines, we need to encourage their commitment to the journey, not just the outcome.

Ready to Help Teens Build Confidence and Character ?

The journey through sports, school, and new activities is full of lessons that go beyond the game. Like the experiences shared in this post, my programs are designed to help students discover their inner strength and learn to stay committed, even when times are tough. I focus on building the skills—like resilience, commitment, and confidence—that will serve them long after the final whistle blows.

Visit harrietturk.com to learn more about how I can help your teen build the character they need to succeed.